Sometime today it dawned on me that I had broken my agreement to post every day this year. I did not post yesterday and didn’t even think about it. I thought this was strange since my blogging has become so habitual.
At first I was angry with myself for breaking my agreement. Then I remembered, I keep agreements to expand myself not to punish myself. Then I counted to see how many days in a row I had posted. I actually started a couple of days before the new year began, so I had a total of 213 posts in a row.
So the conversation has been going back and forth in my head periodically throughout the day.
“I can’t believe I didn’t even think about it!”
“It’s not the end of the world.”
“No matter what I do now, I can’t complete the agreement to post every day this year.”
“It’s not about perfection. It’s about pushing yourself.”
Then, as I observe the voices in my head, I laugh at how funny it all is. Me, arguing with myself… and all over something that is already done.
So now I am recommitting to my agreement to post every day for the rest of the year, accepting my imperfect record, and eager to see if I can complete the last 5 months of this year without missing a day. (If I was really interested in punishing myself, I would start all over again. Not happening!)
I am just going to keep reminding myself, 213 posts in a row… not too shabby.