Moving On

Today I said “buh-bye” to some more things that no longer serve me. I attended a Burning Bowl Ceremony at the spiritual center I attend. I was reminded once again that things I once cherished were the very things I needed to release.

Letting go of the past allows me to step into a new possibility, often one I had not yet imagined. Hurdles may slow me down, and change the trajectory of my life, but they do not have to stop me. I have found that it is my thoughts about events, rather than the circumstances themselves that get in my way.

Today I will release, forgive, and move on once more.

 

Renewed Spirit

It has been a rough week for me.  I have struggled with my anxiety and depression.  Both have won much of the time.  Today, however, the pattern seems to be broken — or at least blurred.  

It was difficult to get out of bed, but once I did things improved.  I showered and got ready to attend my granddaughter’s baby dedication.  After the church service, a large group of family and friends went out for lunch.  At the restaurant, I sat beside my granddaughter, who is always a great source of entertainment.  

After a leisurely lunch, my husband and I made a few stops to look for some bolts he needed for a truck repair he is doing.  Along the way, we stopped at a convenience store for a drink.  Now, I know this sounds as exciting as watching paint dry, but for me it was renewal.  My spirits have been so low, that simply being out with other people made me feel better.  

So I am heading into the week with this renewed spirit.  It is my intention to hold onto it as long as I possibly can.      

Summer Solstice

Today’s Summer Solstice, the first day of summer and the longest day of the year, will be a little longer for some.   Today my sister-in-law buried her oldest son.  What should have been a day to celebrate the beginning of summer, instead was a day of mourning.

At the graveside service, the officiant quoted from the third chapter of Ecclesiastes.  This version is from the New Revised Standard Version Catholic Edition (NRSVCE).

3  For everything there is a season, and a time for every matter under heaven:

2  a time to be born, and a time to die;
    a time to plant, and a time to pluck up what is planted;
3  a time to kill, and a time to heal;
    a time to break down, and a time to build up;
4  a time to weep, and a time to laugh;
    a time to mourn, and a time to dance;
5  a time to throw away stones, and a time to gather stones together;
    a time to embrace, and a time to refrain from embracing;
6  a time to seek, and a time to lose;
    a time to keep, and a time to throw away;
7  a time to tear, and a time to sew;
    a time to keep silence, and a time to speak;
8  a time to love, and a time to hate;
    a time for war, and a time for peace.

While there may be some wisdom in these words, the loss of a child upsets the order of things.  For everything there is a season… a time to die for us all.  Parents want that time to be before our children.  Time will bring acceptance and healing.  Until then, we allow ourselves to grieve the untimely passing of Zachary Rausch, gone too soon.

A Prayer

Many people around me are hurting today.

Today’s post is simply a prayer…

A prayer for comfort for my brother-in-law and sister-in-law who just lost their son, and for all those who have lost loved ones…

A prayer for healing for my step-father who is very ill and headed back to the hospital, and for all those who are struggling with health issues…

A prayer for rest for those who are overworked…

A prayer for abundance for those who are struggling financially…

A prayer for sobriety for those with addictions…

A prayer for safety for those in harm’s way…

A prayer for companionship for those who are lonely…

A prayer for courage for those who are afraid…

A prayer for the human condition.

The wide spectrum…

The wide spectrum of mothering
To those who gave birth this year to their first child—we celebrate with you
To those who lost a child this year – we mourn with you
To those who are in the trenches with little ones every day and wear the badge of food
stains – we appreciate you
To those who experienced loss through miscarriage, failed adoptions, or running away—we
mourn with you
To those who walk the hard path of infertility, fraught with pokes, prods, tears, and
disappointment – we walk with you. Forgive us when we say foolish things. We don’t
mean to make this harder than it is
To those who are foster moms, mentor moms, and spiritual moms – we need you
To those who have warm and close relationships with your children – we celebrate with you
To those who have disappointment, heart ache, and distance with your children – we sit
with you
To those who lost their mothers this year – we grieve with you
To those who experienced abuse at the hands of your own mother – we acknowledge your
experience
To those who lived through driving tests, medical tests, and the overall testing of
motherhood – we are better for having you in our midst
To those who have aborted children – we remember them and you on this day
To those who are single and long to be married and mothering your own children – we mourn
that life has not turned out the way you longed for it to be
To those who step-parent – we walk with you on these complex paths
To those who envisioned lavishing love on grandchildren, yet that dream is not to be – we
grieve with you
To those who will have emptier nests in the upcoming year – we grieve and rejoice with you
To those who placed children up for adoption – we commend you for your selflessness and
remember how you hold that child in your heart
And to those who are pregnant with new life, both expected and surprising –we anticipate
with you
This Mother’s Day, we walk with you. Mothering is not for the faint of heart and we have
real warriors in our midst. We remember you.
By Amy Young (http://messymiddle.com)

This was read in my church this morning.  It touched me so I thought I would share.  The link to the pdf is here. It was originally part of Amy Young’s May 10, 2012 post, An open letter to pastors {A non-mom speaks about Mother’s Day}, on her blog The Messy Middle   

Daniel Fast

Today I began the Daniel Fast, a 21 day, biblically based, eating plan.  It is a way for me to hit the reset button, as I have been on a weight loss program for a while and I have hit a plateau.  The primary differences between this eating plan and the way I eat now is that the plan does not allow meat or dairy.  I am not a huge dairy consumer and I am not one who must have meat, so this shouldn’t be too bad.  I was on a cleanse last year that didn’t allow meat or dairy for the first week and it was fine.

The most compelling thing for me is the spiritual component of the fast.  The purpose for the fast is to gain clarity.  I have chosen to make it my own, so I am meditating in the morning as part of my program.  I meditate sporadically.   I will do it faithfully for months at a time.  Then, for whatever reason, I stop.  Meditation is good for me.  It calms me, centers me, and gives me a sense of well-being.  I am hoping that doing the Daniel Fast will help me get back on track and that I stick to my meditation for a while.  I will post about my progress over the coming weeks.  Until then, here is my favorite meditation story.

 

 

 

 

 

 

Holy Saturday

For many Christians, today is a quiet day of prayer and mourning prior to the joyous celebration of Christ’s resurrection.  My prayer today is for wisdom gained from introspection, peace within, and joy in the morning.  Happy Easter!